Learning to do less

One of my goals for 2021 is to go slow. 

It sounds simple, but it’s hard for many of us.  I love to be active, productive, creating, and organizing.  I love to see quick results and lots of them. 

For many lawyers, chronic stress is a fact of life.  I am no exception.  I lived for years in a harried state of conscientious and pressured over-responsibility.  I learned recently that this way of being continues to affect my health even now. 

By slowing down, I can allow myself the opportunity to recover.  To build some new pathways in my brain that are more sound, healthier, and longer-lasting. 

A second goal is to create space.  This is related, but not exactly the same.  Slow refers to pace, as they say it’s a marathon not a sprint.  But creating space means physical, emotional, visual, and mental rest.  It means having less, doing less, and even doing nothing.

I just finished an article for a major legal industry publisher (coming soon in March!) about authenticity & motherhood.  As I was writing I felt a lot of power in one line, that we need to have a real conversation about lowering the bar.  As a high-achiever this makes me uncomfortable.  But we’ve been living in multi-tasking mayhem during the pandemic (if not longer) and it’s true.  We’re trying to operate above our capacity for a sustained period.  The machinery will break down.  The wheels will come off.  And we owe it to ourselves and each other to be honest and authentic about this fact.  I’m showing up today to tell you I feel it, too. 

I need to do less.

I’ve learned to take breaks in my work day.  But since working from home, these breaks have filled up quickly with others tasks: laundry, prepping dinner, or writing a LinkedIn post.  A break that involves task-switching to another form of work is not really a break!

The truth is, I pride myself on the balance and variety in my life.  I spend time and energy working on my garden and my farm, in my law practice, coaching, and parenting or playing with my kids.  I read, cook, and take care of our house.  And I sleep.  But in my waking hours, I am in constant motion.  Even if my body is still my brain is hard at work on a project. 

When we operate this way, it’s too easy to push through our physical limitations in favor of recovery.  When we live in our heads, we may not even feel that it’s happening.  Yet over time it takes a toll. 

My pace can be slower.

My brain can be quieter.

I can do less.

These last few weeks I have been asking myself what it looks like to slow down and create space.  As my clients know, I like to visualize something so we know what we are trying to achieve. 

What can I create in that white space?

Rest.  Recovery.  Mindfulness.  Clarity.  Peace.  Strength.

What incredible value this pace and space will offer me.  I will feel calmer, healthier, peaceful, and strong. I will be restored and ready to take bold steps forward in my own time.

And what does it look like to slow down and create space?  I have some ideas. 

Maybe it looks like:

• Sitting with my coffee in the sunshine (instead of the light of my phone).

• Blocking 15 minutes between meetings to listen to a guided meditation, stretch, or step outside.

• Caring for my houseplants for 5 minutes in a quiet, meditative way.

• Resuming walks by myself in the morning (when it’s warmer) or at lunch.

• Blocking chunks of time on my calendar to minimize interruptions.

• Nighttime meditation before bed to replace late-night email or scrolling.

• Restorative yoga.

• A hot cup of tea.

• Sitting quietly by a window.

• Journaling.

• Watercolor or colored pencils.

• Passive healing modalities such as massage, acupuncture, or reiki.

• Gentle, mindful movement and stretching.

• Allowing time to do nothing.

• Reducing my expectations for how much I try to get done each day.

• Fewer coaching clients and speaking engagements.

• Eating lunch with a fork and no screen.

In the coming weeks I’ll be experimenting with these and other strategies to create more restorative space in my day.  I’ll be making notes about how I feel before, during, and after each activity.  I’ll be asking, and I hope you will, too:

What is truly restorative and not just another to-do on my list?   

At the end of the day, less is more.  For many of us it is the lesson of Covid. It is a lifestyle change and a mindset shift toward recovery instead of productivity. I’m committed to living it out this year. I believe that it’s important to take lots of these breaks and continue them consistently, diligently over time in order to experience a difference.

Tell me, are you making changes to go slow or create space in your life?  I’d love to hear what feels right to you.

PS  I’m also eating carbs again.  Chocolate chip cookies make me happy.