We are at a turning point in the pandemic world. We have survived a period of deep loss, disconnection, uncertainty. We have been isolated, anxious, living behind a mask. 

This is hard stuff. 

We’re still here.

We’re showing up. 

We’re all a little uncertain about how to reconnect, how to be together again.

But I think many of us have this feeling that we want to show up more authentically.  As we reenter life together, we want to be our true selves.  This unmasking requires a lot of vulnerability, but it also means we have the opportunity to connect and live courageously.   

It starts with self-awareness.   

For any of us to reclaim our voices, we have to give them space to tell the story. 

I believe that we start this process in a very personal and intimate way.  Privately.  Not in place of but in sequence before and alongside activism, outreach, and relational leadership.  We’re also doing the work for ourselves.

As I’ll explain, I think a very simple grounding practice can give your soul the space it needs to breathe. It’s so simple that it’s often overlooked.

The simple practice is writing. 

Journaling is the only opportunity we have to be in conversation with that inner voice without any other audience.  It allows us to work through and shed the expectations and filters that can make it difficult to hear our intuition speaking. Among the many benefits of this practice, it helps us find:

1. Clarity

2. Creativity

3. Fluency

4. Mindfulness

5. Honesty and Vulnerability

6. Gratitude

7. Self-Acceptance/Self-Compassion

8. Confidence

9. Healing

10. Discipline

11. Vision

As a coach, I help my clients understand that they already have all the answers.  My job is not to tell them what to do, although sometimes I can’t help myself—after all, in my day job I give advice for a living! 

And let me tell you, lawyers love homework.  They love a worksheet.  They love to be graded.  I’ll admit that sometimes I send a list of prompts or a worksheet to a coaching client, and they’ll scan it back to me hoping for approval.  It’s part of our culture that we are always looking to others for answers or for validation, and seeking approval and belonging is human nature of course.

But the truest answers, the most profound transformation, and the most lasting results come when we find the answers ourselves. 

When we figure it out in our own way and our own time. The writing process helps many people do that. It helps them connect the dots to realize when they have made a realization.  It might be sitting there just under the surface and needs a little of the dirt sifted off, a little polish in the written word. 

Here are some strategies for getting started with journaling on your own.

• Morning pages – As described in The Artist’s Way, you take time first thing in the morning to write 2-3 pages of absolutely anything at all.  Clear your head for the day.

• Gratitude – A simple gratitude practice can help to retrain your brain to think positively, and it will prompt you to notice more good things throughout your day.  This can be done in the morning or at the end of the day, or anytime you need a boost.  In a few minutes we’ll try this out.

• Bedtime brain dump – The reverse of the morning pages.  Writing for 20 minutes, or a set number of pages, before bed helps to clear your mind.  It allows you to stop churning over things and get a better night’s sleep.  You might even find some clarity over the next right thing to do the following day, or let go of something that’s bothering you. 

• Arrival times – For those of us who are back to commuting in the real world, a simple strategy is to try to arrive a few minutes early.  Before you get out of the car, take out your notebook and write what’s on your mind.  It might help you transition and be intentional with the energy you bring into the next activity.  Even if you’re not commuting, you can do something similar between virtual meetings at home, but I recommend moving to a different spot in the house to allow yourself the same pause.

• Weekend power hour – Carving out an hour to write on the weekend can feel intimidating, but it’s a great practice if you really want to improve your writing as a craft or work on a particular topic or skill.

• Tiny notes on your phone – Taking small notes on your phone is absolutely better than nothing, particularly if you don’t have paper handy.  Create an open note on your phone for recording your thoughts, or even just a list of things you like.  It helps create a place just for you to keep those thoughts – instead of putting everything on social media, which we’ll talk about in a sec.

• Bullet journaling – A highly organized style of journaling that allows you to index by topic over time and to organize and plan your goals and your productivity.  If you are working on time management, mood tracking, and developing other healthy habits this can be a great strategy.

• "Parking place" – Sometimes there’s just too much going on and we can’t tackle it all at once.  I like to use a “parking place” strategy with coaching clients – for example, parking your worries or parking your goals.  I may not be able to get to some big projects in the next few months, but it doesn’t mean I give up on them.  I can create a parking place and still dream about them, make notes, and journal so they are safe there and not just swimming around in my brain.  

• Write a letter to your past/future self – Writing a letter to yourself puts you in direct conversation with your voice, or a past/future self, and allows you to do very intense work to tell your story, reframe your negative self-talk, or even say “thank you” for everything you’ve done.  Say thank you to yourself.  This is a powerful technique that some people find helpful to do on a regular cadence, like every year at a certain time or at a big milestone.  For example, after a major career moment, you might write a letter to your past self saying thanks for all her hard work.  Or you might write a letter from your future self on your birthday promising all of the good things that lie ahead.

• Prompts – Using a different prompt each time you sit down to write can help get through writer’s block and make some new discoveries.  You can use the handout with prompts I shared recently at my presentation to the Auburn Women’s Leadership Conference or find entire books of writing prompts. 

• Skip (or mess up) the first page! – My personal favorite.  If you buy a beautiful new notebook and get psyched out about using it, try this.  Just skip the first page.  Or scribble all over it.  Go ahead and mess it up, get that out of the way, so you can start using it.  Self-discovery is messy work and we can’t worry about the perfect handwriting.  Just skip the first page, and dig in.

Here’s what I most want you to remember:

You are the author of your own story, in spite of everything.

You shape it not only by the big decisions you make.  The huge moments of courage and the milestones you celebrate, but also in the small ways you honor yourself.

Develop a practice of listening to your inner voice.

To find it in the written word on the page.

Just write, even when you don’t know what to say or what comes next.

And over time, you’ll find your voice. 

It’s always there underneath the noise around us.

Listen.

You’ll find confidence and clarity.

So you can be the author of your story.

So you can connect with others, lead others, and live with joy and intention.

**This post includes excerpts from my keynote presentation at the Auburn Women’s Leadership Conference 2021. More details available at www.essentiallychip.com/wlc-2021